Being Scorpio

Born under the constellation of extremes, I find I am often near the edge. I have a plan. Actually, hundreds of them. The issue is that I am likely to be deep in, buried, and seduced one month, but clearly have moved on the next.

I forget. I forget that this is my nature and when I am all in, I am all in. For all the areas I decided to give up or let go, I am slightly  tempted, sometimes. I feel the feelings and keep moving. But new considerations have arisen. Probably because I have free time from my prior obsessions.

I'm lying in bed and decide the kitchen base cabinets have to come out. This is much easier in bed. After we get them out, I realize I have not considered storage for the stuff inside. Then I see the walls need to be painted. Now I need new storage and more paint. Cause the paint I already bought ...

And since I'm painting, I may as well create a design for the available walls. Just a little more paint - specialty this time.

I'm looking for the balance - ease and effort. Without my usually obsessions I am an opened  void clambering to be filled. I am overwhelmed by the too muchness of Spring. Time to clean. Time to plant. Time to change. All these demands, but I have no extra time.

Aww...I miss Winter already.

Wandering in Circles

I watch her walk from room to room, touching the walls, furniture, doors. She stops and stares with blank, empty, clouded cornea, into the surrounding space. Some times she smiles, or laughs - out loud. The way one is meant to laugh at the fun and joy of life. Then her head wobbles that customary rock and roll atop her neck we have come to associate with the blind. She cracks herself up.

I wonder what is funny. What has tickled her so? I ask, but she can't hear me. I laugh, too, because it is easy and rich. My heart opens softly and if I let the laugh sink in tears trickle down my cheek. Whatever she has released, it is good.

The wandering isn't always so pleasant, but neither is life. It's all about balance. We take the joy and the pain and walk the labyrinth finding depth and understanding in our soul.

Reflecting on being...on the path.

Reality

No matter your ideas, religion, or belief. We are all one. We are intimately connected so that when I exhale you inhale my breath. We are a part of the cycle of life from creation to death. To continue to deny this fact is to live in illusion.

Wake up into Love.

Sourced Within

Wherever I am, God is.
Wherever I am, God is.
Wherever I am, God is.

The search is over. There is no need to struggle. God is here.

When we accept that we are the vessel of Source/Soul/God, we open to our true being and from our hearts we extend the Love that is.

This is my simple religion. There is no need for temples; no need for complicated philosophy. Our own brain, our own heart is our temple; the philosophy is kindness.

-His Holiness, The 14th Dalai Lama

Today, I reveled in the simple laughter of a busy toddler as she climbed, jumped, and played in shredded paper. Her joy at being with me, sharing her happiness, and teaching me her new words shifted my perspective on living a good day. Shifting perspectives changes our hearts. Ah, kindness...

In love with open hearts...more on the journey. 

To See With New Eyes

We added a new prayer to our bedtime ritual - a chant/manta actually, though the oldest created a new song about love and protection she insisted we sing. The baby has learned to stack hands and shout happy, so we did that too. I'm tired. I just want them to go to sleep.

Every day is a moment by moment occasion to give up something. Not as in stop doing, but really just not giving a good ... It takes them minutes to completely wreck the house. All I need to do is leave the room to cook dinner or wash the dishes, or shame on me, use the bathroom. And now that I have fussed them out for what I hope is the last time, I may just leave things as they are.

I am determined to see things differently, to find the smooth places in the path rather than stumbling through the daily debris. By the time night falls and self  assessment thumps my skull, I realize I have succumbed again to my distress.

What I need are new eyes. I need an entirely new approach to what are my chosen daily events that feel like struggles and challenges. My readings on kindness mock me. Be kind.

I feel crabby and out of sorts. I am pissed that I have not accomplished what I expect. I am angry that another has not picked up the slack. I would be hurt, but I know better. Mostly, I am out of answers, and questions. Be kind.

Be quiet. I am better at that these days. Better, that's all. At least in quiet I keep to myself the fuming that pushes to escape. As I type I feel like I won't get it together, but that is a lie. I will take the time to tend my heart, to relax. I will neglect the tasks that annoy me. There is always tomorrow, and if there's not, well, I'm not wasting tonight doing something other than what brings me joy,

I can see I need a bigger shift than I thought. I will trust in Source that just as my distress has been revealed, so will deliverance come. Be kind. Start with yourself.

Stumbling down the path...

In Bright Blessings.

We have various constructs that allow us to rethink and re-evaluate our lives and choices. The end of the calendar year and next beginning, any number of holidays, events, or situations can cause an assessment of how, when, and why.

I choose the Lenten Season to re-establish my purpose and choices, to celebrate all that have come before and release those things I no longer find useful.

In the past, the question or statement around this season was about giving up. "What are you giving up for Lent?"

I ask, "How will you be shaped anew by accepting challenges and allowing them to change you? What are you taking on? How will you grow?"

Giving up and letting go will most certainly address those areas, if we let it. If we commit to feeling the shift that "giving up" opens within us. If we face the ache, hurt, or pain associated with holding on.

The Lenten Season helps me draw the line in some very hard places. Lent gives me permission to draw the line and hold it in those moments I would vacillate. My desire is to have shifted so dramatically that stepping back into the old pattern is not an option.

Here on the journey to a more authentic self...

Blessed be.

Honoring Perfection

Too often we neglect the perfection in our lives. We skip over the easy stuff and grumble as we struggle to reach the farthest point.

Art, photos, nature, children, or other socially constructed and condoned images elicit recognition of perfection. Math and science offer insight into the many missed aspects of what we hold as perfect.

But for a moment, acknowledge what is perfect in your life today. Anything. Find the forgotten, the dismissed, the neglected, and relish them.

It usually takes an act of denial to bring forth the joy and wonder of what we already have. What if we appreciated what we have in this present moment? Appreciation is the principle of growth and expansion.

Share the new and good in your life. Open to receiving more.

On kindness;

Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echos are truly endless.             Mother Teresa